Aging isn’t just a biological inevitability, it’s a process that can be shaped by how we live, what we value, and the way we think. In an engaging discussion with Dr. Robert Friedland, a professor and Chair of Neurology at the University of Louisville, we explore the themes of his book Unaging and the four key factors that influence the way we age: cognitive, physical, psychological, and social reserves.
Dr. Friedland, an eminent researcher in Alzheimer’s disease, begins by emphasizing the spiritual lens through which aging can be viewed. He shares a moment from a dinner conversation where he tried to dissuade a smoker from her habit, not just on medical grounds but from a spiritual and philosophical perspective. Drawing from religious teachings, he stressed the sanctity of the human body and the responsibility to preserve it.
He explains that many harmful behaviors stem from the false belief that death is inevitable and random: “when you’re going to go, you’re going to go.” But as Dr. Friedland wisely points out, most of us look both ways before crossing the street. We do exercise control over our risks, and so we must act accordingly when it comes to aging.
According to Dr. Friedland, evolutionary biology offers context. Humans weren’t designed to live long after reproductive years. Evolution prioritizes survival up to the point of raising offspring. Everything beyond is, in many ways, a bonus and how we navigate that bonus period depends on our lifestyle choices.
The Motivation Behind Unaging
Dr. Friedland wrote Unaging to bridge the gap between his limited time with patients and the wealth of lifestyle advice he wanted to share. In his words, the book is a 30-to-40-hour conversation condensed for public understanding. While the title Unaging wasn’t his choice (he preferred “Declaration of Interdependence”), it captures the essence of the book: aging isn’t fixed, it’s modifiable.
The Four Reserves: A Holistic View of Aging
Cognitive, physical, psychological, and social reserves are interdependent. Dr. Friedland illustrates this beautifully with the example of a 90-year-old Japanese man planting flowers in Kyoto. This single act involved all four reserves, timing and planning (cognitive), physical effort, community involvement (social), and emotional satisfaction (psychological).
He recalls another story of a woman in her later years learning to play the cello, running between music classes, and proudly sharing her progress with grandchildren. Such activities, he explains, are vital because they stimulate diverse parts of the brain and help preserve cognitive reserve.
If he had to prioritize one reserve, Dr. Friedland emphasizes physical activity, for its benefits to both heart and brain. Exercise not only improves physical health but supports mental function and emotional resilience.
Modern Challenges: Technology and Processed Lifestyles
While technology has enabled global collaboration and virtual socializing, it also presents new challenges. Excess screen time, digital dependency, and sedentary lifestyles are eroding the social and cognitive interactions essential for healthy aging.
Dr. Friedland is particularly concerned about children growing up immersed in screens, missing out on face-to-face communication and emotional development. He encourages parents to prioritize conversation and shared experiences.
When Should You Start? Sooner Than You Think
The optimal time to build reserves is childhood. Lifestyle patterns formed early, diet, activity levels, social habits, can profoundly affect one’s risk of age-related disease. Even seemingly benign childhood activities, like choosing American football, may have long-term consequences.
Yet, he remains hopeful. It’s never too late to change. Even long-time smokers reduce their risk significantly by quitting. Even someone with limited mobility can benefit from warm-water aquatic therapy. Aging well isn’t about perfection; it’s about effort.
Daily Practices for Every Life Stage
Dr. Friedland suggests incorporating exercise as a non-negotiable part of the weekly schedule, like brushing your teeth. It’s best to commit to three days a week, regardless of mood. Tennis works well, he jokes, because you can’t skip it, you’ve got a partner waiting.
He also urges people to prioritize sleep and mindfulness. Sleep is when the brain detoxifies itself. Meditation, when done regularly, helps in managing stress and maintaining focus.
Building and Maintaining Cognitive Reserve
The brain, he explains, is designed for learning. Activities that challenge you, whether it’s learning a new instrument, studying a language, or solving problems, build cognitive reserve. The key is diversity. Repeating the same tasks doesn’t stimulate new neural connections. Variety in diet, hobbies, social interaction, and mental activity helps the brain remain adaptable.
What About Walking? How Much Is Enough?
Walking is excellent for health, though Dr. Friedland doesn’t commit to a magic number of steps. What’s important is consistency and incorporating movement throughout the day. Climbing stairs, walking to errands, or even water-walking can all count. The goal is to raise the heart rate regularly, but even low-impact activity helps.
Maintaining Social Reserve as You Age
As people retire, lose loved ones, or face physical challenges, social isolation becomes a risk. Dr. Friedland encourages planning for this early, whether it’s by joining community groups, pursuing shared-interest clubs, or continuing education programs.
He shares a story of his 90-year-old aunt attending a physics lecture in Manhattan—taking the subway, engaging intellectually and socially, and living proof that age needn’t diminish vibrancy.
Gut Health and the Microbiome: The Emerging Frontier
Dr. Friedland’s research also explores the microbiome’s influence on brain aging—a field he calls “mapeurinosis.” Microbes in the gut and mouth can influence protein folding in the brain, contributing to diseases like Alzheimer’s and Parkinson’s.
The best way to support gut health? Eat a diverse, fiber-rich diet, low in sugar and saturated fat. He contrasts American meat-and-potato diets with the variety found in Indian cuisine or the Mediterranean diet. He even nods to traditional preparations like chawanprash—not for unverified claims, but as a testament to ingredient diversity.
In Conclusion: Aging as Opportunity
Aging is not something to fear, it’s something to prepare for. Most importantly, it’s not inevitable in the way many believe. With attention to movement, mindset, learning, social engagement, and nutrition, we can age more gracefully and gratefully.
As Dr. Friedland concludes, “It’s not ‘why me?’ It’s a miracle you’re still here. Aging is a privilege, and how you live today determines how you age tomorrow.”
Recommended Reading: Viktor Frankl’s “Man’s Search for Meaning” a reminder that our deepest strength lies in how we find purpose, even in difficulty.
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